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2019年10月18日 03:28:45|来源:国际在线|编辑:百度资讯
Can heterosexual men and women ever be “just friends”? Daily experience suggests that non-romantic friendships between males and females are not only possible, but common. However, a new study suggests that men, relative to women, have a particularly hard time being “just friends.”异性恋男女之间有没有纯粹的友谊?日常经验告诉我们,男女之间纯粹的友谊不仅仅是可能的,而且还很普遍。但最新研究表明,与女性对男性的态度相比,男性更不可能把女性当作普通朋友看待。In order to investigate the viability of truly platonic opposite-sex friendships, researchers brought 88 pairs of undergraduate opposite-sex friends into...a science lab. In order to ensure honest responses, the researchers not only followed standard protocols regarding anonymity and confidentiality, but also required both friends to agree to refrain from discussing the study, even after they had left the testing facility. These friendship pairs were then separated, and each member of each pair was asked a series of questions related to his or her romantic feelings toward the friend with whom they were taking the study.为了研究异性之间是否存在真正纯粹的友谊,研究人员挑选了88对大学生异性朋友参加了一项科学实验。为了确保大家给出诚实的回答,研究人员不仅遵从了匿名、保密等标准试验协议,而且要求异性朋友双方避免讨论这项研究,甚至是在试验结束后。这些异性朋友被分开,研究人员会单独询问每个人是否对参加试验的另一位朋友有好感等一系列问题。The results suggest large gender differences in how men and women experience opposite-sex friendships. Men were much more attracted to their female friends than vice versa. Men were also more likely than women to think that their opposite-sex friends were attracted to them—a clearly misguided belief.研究结果显示,男性与女性对待异性友谊的态度有很大差别。与女性对男性的态度相比,男性更容易喜欢上女性朋友。男性也更容易觉得女性朋友喜欢他们,这当然是一种错觉。In fact, men’s estimates of how attractive they were to their female friends had virtually nothing to do with how these women actually felt, and almost everything to do with how the men themselves felt—basically, males assumed that any romantic attraction they experienced was mutual, and were blind to the actual level of romantic interest felt by their female friends. Women, too, were blind to the mindset of their opposite-sex friends; because females generally were not attracted to their male friends, they assumed that this lack of attraction was mutual. As a result, men consistently overestimated the level of attraction felt by their female friends and women consistently underestimated the level of attraction felt by their male friends.事实上,男性对异性有多喜欢自己的估计几乎和异性朋友的真实感受毫无关系,而仅与男性的自身感受有关。基本上,男性会假设自己体会到的所有浪漫吸引之情都是相互的,完全不知道异性朋友对自己到底有多大好感。女性也对男性的这种心态一无所知,因为女性通常对自己的异性朋友没有好感,她们也会假定对方也不喜欢自己。结果就是,男性一直会高估异性对自己的好感,而女性则恰恰相反。Men were also more willing to act on this mistakenly perceived mutual attraction. Both men and women were equally attracted to romantically involved opposite-sex friends and those who were single; “hot” friends were hot and “not” friends were not, regardless of their relationship status.男性也更愿意为这种误判的互相吸引付诸行动。男性与女性被异性朋友吸引时,都与对方是否单身无关,在这一点上男女并无差异。帅哥靓更受欢迎,而长相平平的则无人倾心,与对方的感情状况无关。However, men and women differed in the extent to which they saw attached friends as potential romantic partners. Although men were equally as likely to desire “romantic dates” with “taken” friends as with single ones, women were sensitive to their male friends’ relationship status and uninterested in pursuing those who were aly involved with someone else.但在将“名花有主”的异性朋友视为潜在的浪漫对象的程度上,男女之间存在差别。尽管男性不管女性朋友是否单身,都期待和她的“浪漫约会”,但女性对男性朋友的感情状况非常敏感,对追求已经不再单身的男性没有兴趣。In a follow-up study, 249 adults (many of whom were married) were asked to list the positive and negative aspects of being friends with a specific member of the opposite sex. Variables related to romantic attraction (e.g., “our relationship could lead to romantic feelings”) were five times more likely to be listed as negative aspects of the friendship than as positive ones.在一次追踪研究中,研究人员要求249名成年受访者(其中很多人已婚)列出与某位异性保持友谊的优缺点。与浪漫感情有关的变数(比如,我们的友谊可能会发展为恋爱)被列为缺点的几率比列为优点大五倍。However, the differences between men and women appeared here as well. Males were significantly more likely than females to list romantic attraction as a benefit of opposite-sex friendships, and this discrepancy increased as men aged.事实上,这项调查也是男女有别。男性更可能把感情上的互相吸引列为异性友谊带来的好处,而且随着男性年龄的增大,这种差别也在增大。So, can men and women be “just friends?” If we all thought like women, almost certainly. But if we all thought like men, we’d probably be facing a serious overpopulation crisis.因此,男女之间存在纯粹的友谊吗?如果我们都像女人那样想,当然是肯定的。但如果我们都像男人那样去想,那地球上就要人口大爆炸了。 /201210/205905

More signs have emerged during the weekend that a mysterious woman recently seen with North Korean leader Kim Jong Eun in several events might be his wife. 上周末,有更多的迹象表明,近期陪同朝鲜领导人金正恩(Kim Jong Eun)公开露面的神秘女子可能是他的妻子。 On Sunday, Korean Central News Agency showed the woman accompanying Mr. Kim on a visit to a kindergarten in Pyongyang. In a dotted yellow one-piece and a Chanel-style white tweed jacket, matching with ivory toe-open high heels, the woman gave the image of a confident — and fashionable - First Lady. 上周日,朝中社(Korean Central News Agency)的报道显示,一名女子陪同金正恩视察了平壤的一家幼儿园。这名女子身穿黄底带圆点的连身裙,外面罩了一件香奈儿式的白色粗花呢夹克,同时搭配了一双露脚趾的象牙色高跟鞋。这名女子俨然展现出了一名自信而且时尚的第一夫人的形象。 She looked at ease and natural with Mr. Kim. In some photos, she was standing right next to him when he was talking to a group of children. Other officials, including Mr. Kim#39;s uncle Jang Song Thaek, were several steps behind. She also appeared to send Mr. Kim affectionate looks. 她在金正恩身边时显得放松而自然。从一些照片来看,金正恩与孩子们交谈时,她就站在金正恩的身边,而包括金正恩的姑父张成泽(Jang Song Thaek)在内的其他官员都站在距金正恩几步远的位置。她似乎也多次向金正恩送去含情脉脉的眼神。 On July 7, she made her public debut by accompanying Mr. Kim to a musical extravaganza that featured a western-style band and rip-off Disney characters. Unlike other senior officials who were sitting stiffly with their hands on their thighs, she seemed more comfortable, with her arms on armrests and a slightly lean toward Mr. Kim. 7月7日,这名女子在陪同金正恩参加一场以西式乐队和山寨迪士尼人物为特色的大型音乐会时第一次公开亮相。与其他双手放在大腿上、坐姿拘谨的朝鲜高官不同,她看起来更加放松。她把双手放在扶手上,身体稍微向金正恩的方向倾斜。 The next day, she was shown again with Mr. Kim on a visit to Kumsusan Memorial Palace where the bodies of his grandfather and father, Kim Il Sung and Kim Jong Il, are displayed. The event marked the 18th anniversary of Kim Il Sung#39;s death. Kim Jong Eun and the woman bowed in front of two photos of Kim Il Sung and Kim Jung Il while other officials standing behind them saluted. 第二天,这名女子再次露面,这一次是陪同金正恩到锦绣山纪念宫(Kumsusan Memorial Palace)参加纪念金日成(Kim Il Sung)去世18周年的活动。金正恩的祖父金日成和父亲金正日(Kim Jong Il)的遗体都被保存在锦绣山纪念宫供人瞻仰。金正恩和这名女子在金日成和金正日的画像前鞠躬,而其他官员则站在二人身后行礼。 With no way to confirm the identity of the woman, outsiders#39; guesses can go only so far. 由于没有办法确认这名女子的身份,外界的猜测也就只能到这个程度了。 But her repeated appearance with the leader and confident air suggests that there is a high possibility that she is actually his wife. 但是,从这名女子多次出现在金正恩身边,以及她自信的神态可以看出,她很有可能就是金正恩的妻子。 Cheong Seong-chang, a senior fellow at Sejong Institute, wrote in a recent report that #39;Kim Jong Eun might have decided that now is the time to reveal his wife since the succession process completed and his mother Ko Yong Hee was introduced to North Koreans via a propaganda film.#39; 韩国世宗研究院(Sejong Institute)资深研究员郑相昌(Cheong Seong-chang)最近在一份报告中写道,金正恩可能已经做出决定,现在是让他的妻子在公众面前露面的时候了,因为政权过渡已经完成,而且他的母亲高英姬(Ko Yong Hee)也已经通过一部宣传片被朝鲜民众所认识。 Also by introducing the leader#39;s wife, the regime is aiming to nurture Mr. Kim#39;s image as a stable and mature man since Mr. Kim#39;s young age and inexperience have been perceived as his weak point, he wrote. 郑相昌写道,通过对金正恩的妻子进行介绍,朝鲜政府还意在打造金正恩成熟稳重男人的形象,因为太过年轻和缺乏经验被认为是金正恩的弱点。 Speculation about Kim Jong Eun#39;s wife once surfaced in December last year when KCNA aired Kim Jong Il#39;s funeral live. At that time, a mysterious young woman was spotted wearing a black hanbok, traditional Korean mourning clothing. But she remained low-key and didn#39;t come forward to pay tribute. 去年12月有关金正恩妻子的猜测曾一度浮出水面,当时,朝中社直播了金正日的葬礼,人们在画面中发现了一名神秘的、身穿黑色朝鲜传统丧的年轻女子。但这名女子一直非常低调,也没有上前致敬。 Some North Korean analysts believe that Kim Jong Eun got married in 2009 and the couple had a daughter in 2010. 一些朝鲜的分析人士认为,金正恩已于2009年结婚,并且这对夫妇在2010年生下了一个女儿。 /201207/190979

1.She#39;s shy1.很内敛Her Majesty may have reigned for 60 years but she remains quite a shy person at heart. Yes, she’s learnt how to handle all manner of social situations, rise to the occasion, and meet the incredible demands of being a monarch in the modern age, thanks in part to the advice of her closest courtiers。女王尽管已登基60年,骨子里却仍是一个内敛的人。的确,她已学会如何处理各种境况,如何应付自如,或迎合现代社会人们对一位女王的要求;但这些成就部分得归功于她身边大臣的忠谏。2.The smile is real2.她的微笑发自内心I’ve been very struck by just how happy the Queen looks these days. I think that’s down to the fact that the Royal Family has survived the travails of recent decades to emerge as strong as ever. Charles’s predicament following the death of Diana and the difficult years afterwards seems to have been resolved. What’s more, she’s still got the Duke of Edinburgh by her side, and her grandchildren William and Harry – have turned out to be everything she could wish for. In short, the future of the succession seems assured – and I think that’s a source of tremendous pride and satisfaction to her。近来女王看上去很开心。我想这跟王室坚强熬过几十年的艰难风雨有关吧。无论是戴安娜王妃之死还是查尔斯的窘境,都已成为过往。何况爱丁堡公爵还陪伴在她身边,孙子威廉和哈利一切也都顺顺当当,王室继承还将继续下去——对女王而言,这就是莫大的自豪和欣慰了吧。3.She has a wicked wit3.风趣聪慧She can be very funny – a side of her which the public rarely gets to see. I think she’s all too aware that as a monarch she has to be serious and representative of the nation, but in private she can often display a real sense of fun and a lovely, spontaneous sense of humour。女王有时非常风趣——只可惜公众很少有机会看到罢了。作为女王,她意识到自己得严肃正经,要展现一国君主之风范。但私下里,她真的很风趣,有时还耍点调皮的小幽默。4.Faith underpins her life4.她对待信仰忠贞不渝The Queen is of course the head of the Church of England – but it’s sometimes forgotten that she’s also a woman of deep Christian faith. I once saw her holding a rather worn prayer book which I think is in itself telling – because it shows that this is a woman who doesn’t just pay lip service to God, but prays and is a true believer. She is of course a regular churchgoer, and I’m sure she has drawn great sustenance from her faith during difficult times in her reign。当然,女王是英国国教会的最高元首;但很少有人意识到她本人就是一名忠诚的基督教徒。我曾看她拿着一本非常破旧的祈祷书——这恰好说明女王绝非虚有其表,而是千真万确信仰上帝。她也经常去教堂做礼拜。我想,正是这种虔诚的信仰才帮她度过了在位期间的艰难岁月吧。5.She#39;s a make-do-and-mend Queen5.她勤俭节约The Queen has never been an extravagant person. She was 13 when World War II began, so her formative years were hugely shaped by growing up in the shadow of the conflict. The entire nation had to make sacrifices and while no one is suggesting the Royal Family had to slum it, Britain stood alone for a while against Germany, food was rationed and there was a real sense of make-do-and-mend. That’s something that has stayed with the Queen all her life, and I think that’s partly why she likes Kate, who’s not afraid to wear the same dress twice, and is so patently not in the ‘spend, spend, spend’ mould。女王向来不喜欢铺张浪费。第二次世界大战爆发时她才13岁,在战争的阴影中长大。当时全英国人民都得做出牺牲,尽管没人要求王室参与其中,但他们却并未逃避责任。英国与德国孤军奋战时,食物都定量配给,一切都得省吃俭用。而这种勤俭节约的作风就此伴随了女王一生。女王之所以喜欢凯特,很可能也因为凯特从不介意一件衣多穿两次吧。显然,凯特也不是“大手大脚”类型的人。6.Children are special to her6.她特喜欢小孩It’s rarely remarked upon, but the humility the Queen shows when she receives flowers from children says a lot to me about the hidden monarch. She must have been handed thousands of garlands by countless children – but judging by the way in which she accepts them, you’d be forgiven for thinking it’s the first time she’s been given flowers. The way she bends down to accept flowers from small children is tantamount to her saying that she regards them as her equals。这或许不值得一提,但女王接过孩子们鲜花时的谦逊神情也能展现她不为人知的一面。她一定收到过数不清的孩子们的鲜花——但每次看她接花的方式,你都会以为这是她第一次收到鲜花呢。她弯腰接过鲜花的神情,恰好表明她真将孩子平等相待的。7.She is serious about her duty7.她恪尽职守The Queen has laid a wreath at the Cenotaph on Remembrance Sunday on all but a handful years during her long reign– the only exceptions being when she was either pregnant or overseas on an official visit (1959, 1961, 1963, 1968, 1983 and 1999). This terribly moving annual ceremony means a huge amount to her, in large part because she lived through World War II, and saw how great a price we as a nation paid to preserve our freedom。女王在位期间,除了怀或出国访问(1959年, 1961年, 1963年, 1968年, 1983年和 1999年),几乎每年都在阵亡将士纪念日那天去纪念碑前敬献花圈。女王自己就经历过二战,亲眼看到一个国家为争取自由所付出的巨大代价。所以,她尤为看重这个节日。8.She#39;s kind at heart8.她温厚善良This isn’t something that’s ever much reported, but she’s very thoughtful for anyone she knows who has been bereaved or ill, performing little acts of kindness. For instance, she paid a private visit to Martin Charteris (above) – who served her for many years as her Assistant Private Secretary and then Private Secretary, and did so much for her as a young monarch – shortly before his death in 1999.很遗憾关于女王这方面的报道并不多。其实,她非常关心身边的人。不管谁病了或失去了亲人,她都会给予安慰。1999年,马丁查特里斯去世之前,她曾特意看望过他——马丁曾担任她的私人秘书助理,后来又成为正式私人秘书,为年轻时的女王立下过汗马功劳。9.She loved her palace on the water9.她钟爱皇家游艇The Queen was terribly saddened to see the Royal Yacht Britannia pensioned off.She had a huge amount of affection for the ship because it was the only home that was ever specially created for her, in every sense of the word.It’s interesting to note that the Royal Yacht was furnished in a much more contemporary style than the palaces, with their George III antique tables.She also appreciated the freedom the yacht gave her to escape the prying eyes of the world and just be herself。皇家游艇“大不列颠号”被迫退役时,女王很难受。她对这艘游艇很有感情。严格讲来,这是唯一一艘专门为她而造的游艇。不过有趣的是,这艘皇家游艇的风格比皇宫登得多,里面配有乔治三世时代的桌子。而且在游艇上,她能躲开世人的八卦,完完全全属于她自己。10.Animals really are important to her10.她是个动物迷This is a woman who is known for her love of animals, and in particular her corgis.As monarch, from time to time she invites people to Windsor Castle, and I remember being there once when one of her corgis rolled over onto its back at her feet and there was a look of sheer unadulterated joy on her face。人们都知道女王很喜爱小动物,尤其是她那些威尔士矮脚。 女王喜欢时不时地请人去温莎城堡做客。记得我有次在那儿看到威尔士矮脚滚了个四脚朝天,女王顿时乐开了花,开心不已。 /201206/186020

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